Poetry : Thurs 17 Aug
Despite the growing angst which seems to be hitting the festival at midpoint at the moment, in the kitchen, things seem relatively calm - but I must admit it made me wonder what might happen if things got hotter in a restaurant kitchen at a busy period, such as
Toss, chop, steam, boil,
I said toss, chop, steam boil,
Bake, sizzle, fry, sear,
Coat, mix, season, broil.
Steam comes out the kitchen,
More steam out their ears.
Pare, peel, dice, turn,
'Have you done those pears?'
And it's toss, chop, steam, boil,
Bake, sizzle, fry, sear,
'Wash your hands!' 'Get those drinks.'
'See that plate right there?
It needs CHICKEN on it! -
Get it out!' 'Add some beer
To the cock-a-leekie
And then get back in here.'
'Put some pepper on the strawberries,
Then arrange the wings in pairs
Matching wings from the same chicken.
Now take these down the stairs
And get back into the kitchen'
And it's toss, drop, steam, broil,
Break, sizzle, pry, sear.
'Put the wine dregs in the stock pot.
The trifle bowl's right there.
Throw that left over fruit in it
And any savoury remains
That people leave upon their plates
Can go into the haggis
Which we'll feed back to their mates
... to make them
Toss, flop, scream, recoil,
Break, twizzle, cry, fear
Then bring them back for more
Great food at our restaurant
Next year'.
Some people have families or family members joining them this week - and I witnessed one reunion at the Pleasance Dome which was especially touching that inspired this poem
Unfolds an ocean of intimacy,
Her comforting conversational babble bubble
Lending the gentle caress of home
To the cold Edinburgh air.
The winner of Tuesday's poetry competition out of over 20 entries on the topic of 'Coconuts' was Laura Dockrill with her illustrated poem
Once a lonely coconut sat and cried...
To an understanding banana by his side,
'I'm so hairy and ugly
And difficult to love,
I would love to meet a wife
That I could kiss and hug.'
'But you are fun and tropical
And people find you terribly exotic -
You could use this to your advantage -
It could seem quite erotic ...'
'You're right, understanding banana -
I am no fool.
I am a bloody coconut
And coconuts are cool.'
And as soon as he realised,
The best thing he did see -
A refreshing slice of watermelon
Lay rocking on the sea ...
She stumbled over to his tree
And sat down by him (cutely)
And instead of feeling hairy and old -
Coconut told the nuttiest jokes
In the world he'd ever told.
Slice of watermelon was so impressed,
She kissed him all over
And put him to bed.
'NUFF SAID.
So don't be worried if you're called a coconut
And feel like a fool,
Because coconuts tell jokes.
Coconuts are cool ...
Laura Dockrill